Funny Differences – Before & After Marriage

BEFORE - You take my breath away.
AFTER  - I feel like I'm suffocating.
BEFORE - She says she loves the way I
         take control of a situation.
AFTER  - She called me a controlling,
         manipulative egomaniac.
BEFORE - Don't stop.
AFTER  - Don't start.
BEFORE - Is that all you're having?
AFTER  - Maybe you should have just a
         salad, Honey.
BEFORE - $60/doz.
AFTER  - $1.50/stem
BEFORE - We agree on everything.
AFTER  - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?
BEFORE - Victoria's Secret
AFTER  - Fruit-of-the-Loom
BEFORE - I love a woman with curves.
AFTER  - I never said you were fat.
BEFORE - Time stood still.
AFTER  - This relationship is going nowhere.
BEFORE - You look so seductive in black.
AFTER  - Your clothes are so depressing.
BEFORE - I can hardly believe we found each
         other.
AFTER  - I can't believe I ended up with
         someone like you.
BEFORE - Passion
AFTER  - Good Night
BEFORE - Once upon a time
AFTER  - The end